Name and shame the nine

If you have something to say, then you should say it. I believe that wholeheartedly. I'm a proponent of free speech, and hold particular sway with the words of Voltaire, in that "I detest what you write, but I would give my life to make it possible for you to continue to write."

There are of course opinions I disagree with. I don't need however to stamp down on peoples access to voice these opinions. I am capable of holding my own in discourse, and getting my point across, and also compromising where there is a compromise to be found. I know sometimes as well, that I will be the one who expresses an opinion that others disagree with, that might not be popular, but I'll stand by it. I won't hide behind pseudonyms like some childish cyber warrior, I'll say what I have to and be damned for it if needs be. Which brings me to the crux of this particular rant.

Last month, the BBC appointed Cerrie Burnell to host 'Do and Discover' on the CBeebies channel. Cerrie is an actress who's enjoyed success both on TV and the stage prior to her appointment, so her credentials cannot be called ino question. What has been called into question however, is if she is suitable to be on children's TV.

Cerrie's problem it seems, is that she was born with just one arm. Obviously this has not hampered her drive, ambition or talent, as she has strived to forge a career, but what it has hampered is peoples conceptions.

On the BBC forum there have been posts suggesting that Cerrie might scare children, even one who worried that it would cause their child to have nightmares and could have "possibly caused sleep problems," for the kid. There has also been the cynical suggestion that appointment was only borne from political correctness, and done to show the Beeb in a good light.

Not content with airing their concerns there however, there have been nine official complaints made to the BBC. That's nine people who found themselves so incensed that they had to actively get in touch with the channel, presumably with the end aim of removing Ms. Burnell from her job, after all, if that wasn't their intent, what was?

I've always believed that as viewers, as consumers of the media we have a choice what we watch, which is why for the large part, I disagree with people complaining about things on the telly that don't appeal to their individual tastes. In this case then, the parents should simply have stopped their children watching the programme. It would of course then become their responsibility to explain why, and I've no doubt them telling their children "You can't watch it, she's only got one arm," would have been out of the question as it would have highlighted the foolishness of their stance.

This to me is beyond appalling. Society today is supposed to be understanding of affliction, of disability, and of so many other things that go into making the human race a varied and intriguing bunch. How can people declared fit to bring up children, think it's fit to hold such prejudicial views. What is it that has scared their children, and more importantly, what is it that has scared them?

In this case, I don't believe there will have been many children who have been that affected by this, if at all any. We often forget that children are a hell of a lot more resilient than we'd like to give them credit for. Even if they were scared, then we should remember kids get scared of a lot of things. A sensible parent will explain to their child the irrationality of their fear. They will attempt to ease it, to confront it, rather than remove it and let it lie dormant. This is what these parents have so gloriously failed to do. They have failed in their repsonsibility to their children, in their duties as parents.

What should happen now however, is that these parents should take credit for their complaints. The BBC should be given the power to list the names of every complainant that gets in touch, starting with these nine half wits. If they have the gumption to try and get a woman sacked for nothing more than being disabled, then they should be willing to stand up and take the flack for their shortsightedness and their militant discrimination.

Either that, or they should be forced to watch the Paralympics. That should cause enough fear in them to enduce a good sized heart attack.

Please be quiet, you're having too much fun.

Now, I hate the PC brigade as much as the next guy. I’m of that stereotypical view that there are people out there who want nothing more than for everyone to conform to a Victorian manner of thinking, and by that I mean scowl at any one who smiles, pray to a vengeful merciless and terrible God, and secretly sodomise the maid/kids.

That may of course be fun to some, and I’m also of the opinion that you should be considerate in your actions. However a little piece of modern Britain caught my eye this week, and to me it summed up the terrible state of affairs we find ourselves in.

A letter has surfaced on the internet that purports to be from Sue Watson. Sue is the Chief Safety Officer at Middlesbrough FC, a title she no doubt earned by being a diligent, studious sort, and paying close attention to all the many things that can hurt and harm you. She was probably bombarded on multiple courses with all kinds of things that some people may find offensive, and like a form of Chinese water torture, this has clearly left her dazed and confused.

Need clarification? Read the letter I’ve linked to here. The shockingly patronising piece of bilge that has apparently been sent to supporters of Middlesbro’, in which she asks for them to keep the noise down.

Perhaps Sue’s last job was as a chief safety officer of a library, were keeping the noise down would have been a high priority, alongside paper-cuts, and nasty coffee stains. You would think however, that now working in a football stadium, noise control would be the last of her problems. In fact, it wouldn’t be a problem.

I have never in my life known a football club discourage noise in a stadium. I have also never known supporters discourage noise, other than air horns, which are the play things of the sort of people who need to command the attention, but have neither the wit nor charm to do it themselves. So for her to suggest that the “constant noise is driving some fans mad,” beggars belief, and even if such complaints did exist, then it’s tantamount to someone going to a dog show and complaining about the barking.

I’ve been to The Riverside Stadium. I went there when my beloved Nuneaton Boro took them to a replay in the FA Cup, and despite getting beat, we made a hell of a lot of noise that day, and I thoroughly enjoyed my trip. I also really enjoyed and appreciated the welcome from the Middlesbro’ fans. I even saved a number of comments made by them praising us on their website, and to this day it still makes me beam with pride when I read them back, so they do have a fond place in my heart. For their fans to be treated so shoddily by their club appals me.

I hope Middlesbro’ reprimand Sue Watson for her clearly ill thought out letter. In fact, I hope they remove her from her job. She clearly has little to no understanding about what it is to be a football fan. I also hope every Middlesbro’ fan who receives this letter from her, returns it to the sender, with a rather blunt suggestion of where she should file it.

America - I take it back.

Hold the front pages. America, I have a confession. For a very long time now, probably around about eight years to be fair, I have been a staunch critic of most things American.

It's not that I dislike Americans. Far from it. Pretty much all the Americans I've ever met have been genuine, friendly people. It's that it has been the popular option for anyone outside of America to hate America. After all, every evil perpetrated on the world became their fault once they elected that monkey to office. To be fair, for that act of stupidity they deserved scorn.

Now however, Bush is gone, and we live in the age of Obama, a man whose reputation has him built up like some kind of marauding Jedi Knight here to save us. His name kinda sounds Jedi too.

So therefore the cool thing to do, is no longer slag off the Yanks. That in mind then, this last Sunday night I settled down with a couple of cold ones for my first ever Superbowl, and oh boy, did I enjoy it!

The whole thing is a massive spectacle. This is not just about the game itself, like the FA Cup final over here is, but more a celebration of the American ideals and way of life. It's a true display of pagentary, in a country often derided for its lack of history. The thing is, knock them all you want for having very little of it, what they do have they're damn proud of.

The presentation of hero of the hour Chelsey "Sully" Sullenberger and his flight crew, who had only last week saved the lives of 155 passengers and countless others on the ground by landing their plane on the Hudson River, should be a reminder to any nation that's shy to praise it's heroes. Over here we chastise our celebrities, look for any reason to detest and despise them. Over there, they champion people. Would we have seen a presentation of a similar hero at any English sporting event? No. Should we? Probably yes. Sullenberger is, without question, a hero. People like that deserve our adulation and praise, and America gets that. Over here, we'd be moaning about people's luggage being ruined, and the possibility he might have swore a little on the descent.

There was also the appearance of Jennifer Hudson, who's family had befallen such terrible tragedy at the back end of '08, and she was met with the sort of dignified and rousing respect she deserved. Again, America's conscience came through trumps.

There was of course a lot mention for America's troops abroad. America, like Britain is a country full of people who questioned the right to invade both Iraq and Afghanistan. America however, is a country that supports its troops without question. A country that understands that it's boys have a job to do, for right or wrong, and again hails them as heroes, be they dead or alive. We're only interested in doing that if they come home in a body bag. It's that sick, mournful nature we've adopted post Diana, that only the dead are worthy of our compassion.

But the main draw for me, was the game. I had no grasp of American football. I've never watched it. I'm not of the opinion that it's a game for poofs and pansies, padded to the hilt. I've seen the injuries if inflicts from my Uni days, when a number of very good friends were part of the American Football Team, and each week a different lad would come hobbling in on crutches to the bar with some sort of spiral fracture up the leg.

The game however, I had no idea about. I knew it was a bit like Rugby, but was daunted to be honest that it might go over me. It didn't. It's relatively simple. You have a certain amount of attempts to reach a certain distance, and ultimately the end zone. If you don't, posession swaps hands. You can of course steal the ball to win posession, but in essence that's it. Easy.

It's compelling viewing as well. Wonderfully tactical, but at the same time brutal in the upmost, it's the closest any sport could have come to full on warfare. And as for drama! Any game where the last two minutes can last for fifteen really builds the suspense. Fantastic. I won't lie, my heart was racing at the end of the three hours, and for a game with so many breaks in play, that's no mean feat. In the end, the Cardinals lost out to a Touchdown in the last minute to the Pittsburgh Steelers. We also saw the longest ever return touchdown in Super Bowl history. Brilliant.

The problem being however, that since my taste, I've been hooked. And to be a real fan of NFL, I need a team. Now, I'm not from the US. I've never been. I have no persuasion for my choice of team, but I know I want one. So how to pick one.

The fairest way I've come up with is to email every NFL team, and ask them to convince me as to why I should pick their team, and become a loyal fan. I've already had a number of personal responses, my favourite perhaps being the Seattle Seahawks response which was simply; "Pick the Seahawks. We have the best quarterback." Nice.

What I'm really looking for is freebies, and to that end I attached my home address so a clever PR person might send me a fan pack or something. Maybe even a shirt. Maybe even a flight over, accomodation, and tickets for their opening game next season.

I'm not saying that would guarantee me as a fan, but I'm sure it wouldn't hurt.